LIFESTYLE

MINTING MONEY: 12/24 WEEKEND PICKS EDITION

Each week our resident gambling degenerate will select his best lock, surprise, and over/under bets in weekend action across a number of leagues.  Get a second-mortgage, pawn your Pogs collection, or get a payday loan- just go place these bets immediately!

We get one of the best Christmas presents one could ever receive this year- a holiday sandwiched between a full slate of Christmas Eve/ Saturday NFL clashes and EPL Boxing Day matchups.  Take a break from raising your Hatchimal and spread good tidings with these value purchases.

NFL Picks

Lock: Tampa Bay (+3) over New Orleans

This line stands out in the NFL slate this weekend as most perplexing line- Tampa Bay has been playing some good ball and won 5 of their last 6, with their only loss a close one to 12-2 Dallas last week.  They need to win to keep playoff hopes alive, and have a better away record (5-2) than home (3-4) this year.  With Brees and Co. favored by three, look for Famous Jameis to keep the playoff run alive at the SuperDome.

 

Easy Money: Will Ezekiel Elliott break the single season rushing record for a rookie? (NO, -300)

Ezekiel is sitting on 1,551 rushing yards and the rookie record is 1,809, so he needs 258 more playing the Lions and Eagles in final two.  With the G-Men losing last night, Dallas has now clinched a bye and home field advantage in the NFC.  I’m not just hating on him because I’m a Redskins fan- the Cowboys will certainly want to rest him and avoid any injury going into the playoffs, so he just won’t see enough time on the field to hit the record.

Over/Under: New York Jets at New England (UNDER 44)

New England has clinched a first-round bye, and the Jets are just turrble.  The game will be played in rainy Foxboro, and I can see a New England defense that held the Broncos to 3 points last week better that with a goose egg against the Jets.  I never pick Unders, but this has all the makings of a boring defensive game with Pats second string on in the 2nd half.

 

EPL Picks

Lock: Watford (pick’em) over Crystal Palace

Alan Pardew has officially been sacked this week, leaving a Crystal Palace side skipperless and struggling near the relegation zone.  These days are certainly over.

via GIPHY

Watford has been struggling of late as losers of 4-of-5, but look for them to rebound against a Palace side that has lost their way.  The loss should pave the path for this big man’s glorious EPL return…. Much to the FA’s delight.

via GIPHY

 

Longshot: Sunderland (+1200 win or +525 tie) at Manchester United

Sunderland’s David Moyes returns to Old Trafford seeking revenge against the club that sacked him less than a year into his six year contract.  Having still not found their next Sir Alex Ferguson, this is definitely a trap game where I could see the vengeful Moyes sneaking out with a point or three.  I like the tie more on the three-way line, but will probably put small amounts on both tie and Sunderland win.

 

Over/Under: Swansea/ West Ham OVER 2.5 Goals

Bob Bradley has only been the Swans skipper for 10 games, but is already under fire and thinks his future could be decided by the next two fixtures.  West Ham and Swansea both concede a large amount of goals (2 goals/game each) so expect a goalfest out at east London’s Olympic Park, with the Welsh/Americans winning in the end.