WEEK 16 MATCHUPS
Tuesday, Dec 13:
Everton v Arsenal (2-1):
After Arsenal went up 1-0 courtesy of an Alexis Sanchez free kick, Everton kicked up the tempo and equalized through a Seamus Coleman header in the 44th minute. Ashley Williams, atoning for his mistake that allowed Sanchez’s free kick, scored the winner in the 86th minute to hand the Gunners their first Premier League loss since August. Williams loves to score devastating goals against Arsenal it seems. Arsenal did have a chance to equalize in stoppage time, but Alex Iwobi’s shot was cleared off the line.
Bournemouth v Leicester City (1-0):
Mark Pugh scored the only goal for Bournemouth as the Cherries brushed aside the Foxes at home. It was another hiccup for Leicester as the try to put together a string of victories to get out of the bottom half of the table. Eight years ago Bournemouth was at the bottom of all professional teams in England, so you have to give credit to them.
Wednesday, Dec 14:
West Ham v Burnley (1-0):
If you have been reading these columns, you may have noticed that I continually bring up certain things: Jose Mourinho kicking water bottles, Diego Costa being a model human being, and Burnley not scoring anywhere except at the Turf Moor. Staying in the Premiere League is hard – ask our friends at Norwich City – and to do so you have to be able to get some points away from home. And that usually involves scoring goals: a conundrum it seems for Burnley.
Sunderland v Chelsea (0-1):
Chelsea need to start dropping points, or else this is going to be a repeat of the 2014-2015 season. Sunderland isn’t the team you would expect to stop the Chelsea train, but they did come close to equalizing in stoppage time if not for an amazing save by Thibaut Courtois. Future male model Diego Costa scored the only goal.
Middlesbrough v Liverpool (0-3):
Adam Lallana scored two and assisted another as Liverpool beat the hell out of Middlesbrough to go second in the table – tied with Arsenal. After the controversy with Lorius Karius last week, Simon Mignolet started in his place and made a couple good saves. If Middlesborough manage to lose or not score at least three goals against Swansea this weekend then they have some serious problems.
Tottenham v Hull City (3-0):
At least Middlesborough are not as bad as Hull City. The Tigers let Victor Wanyama, Tottenham’s defensive midfielder, score his first and probably only goal of the season. Christian Ericksen has also scored five goals in the past four games for the streaky Spurs.
Stoke City v Southampton (0-0):
Marko Arnautovic got sent off in the 23rd minute, and Southampton had 72% possession with 15 shots. Yet this ended up a goalless draw. I’ve got nothing else for you. At least Charlie Adam didn’t stamp on anyone.
Manchester City v Watford (2-0):
Pablo Zabaleta and David Silva each scored to stop Manchester City’s losing skid against a Watford side that appeared to not really want to play soccer that day. Unfortunately for City, they will be without Ilkay Gundogan for a couple months as it looks like he injured his knee pretty bad.
Crystal Palace v Manchester United (1-2):
The last time these two played, this happened:
Paul Pogba and Zlatan Ibrahimovic, two people who might have bigger egos than Alan Pardew and Jose Mourinho, scored to give United the win.
West Brom v Swansea (3-0):
In this week’s edition of “Hey That Guy Still Plays in the Premier League!” Salomon Rondon scored a hattrick before Wayne Routledge pulled one back for the Swans.
WEEK 17 MATCHUPS
Saturday, December 17
Crystal Palace v Chelsea
West Ham v Hull City
Stoke City v Leicester City
Middlesbrough v Swansea
Sunderland v Watford
West Brom v Manchester United
Sunday, December 18
Bournemouth v Southampton
Manchester City v Arsenal
Tottenham v Burnley
Monday, December 19
Everton v Liverpool